"What are you watching? More Tango videos?" he asked.
"I wouldn't be laughing so much if I was just watching Tango. In fact, the state of "Professional Tango Performance posted on Youtube" these days is more likely to elicit snores or snorts of disgust. Look, cute animals!"
And indeed, watching videos of animal antics is the perfect way to kill an afternoon - and much more interesting than practicing continuous automatic ochos, brushing up my Tango Resumé, or plotting to take over the entire Tango Universe.
For example, did you know that Pugs sound like pig/monkey/baby hybrids (especially if you have taken their favourite toy?):
Talking about one animal sounding like another - this Rabbit sounds exactly like an elephant:
I swear, I've heard this chortling and whooping before...yes, these Hyenas are making exactly the same celebratory noise usually made by Corrupt Communist Chinese Officials over the big mountain of money they made from corruption!:
And did you know that some goats can be really annoyed by political questionnaires (in Spanish, no less!) and have the ability to shoot snot from their nostrils and yell "WHAAAA? WHAAAAAA?" like they were tough guys from a Scorsese movie?:
Well, this Donkey doesn't sound like another animal, but it sure sounds like... a really passionate, angry Donkey!:
And no, I was misled - The Heavy Metal Gods do not have a monopoly on the most ear-piercing screams. Here's someone's Top Ten on Youtube:
...Not at all impressive if you just peek into the talent pool from the animal kingdom - This poor kitty, for example (his/her name is "Burger and Fries"), can give the Heavy Metal Gods a run for their money:
...And so can this Fox:
...and this Peacock:
...these Howler Monkeys managed a duet:
...the Crows, not to be bested, created this magnificent symphony:
...Even the lowly Frog can sound more awesome than, say, Axl Rose or Steven Tyler:
"Look at all these freakin' talented animals!" I said to Man Yung. "I am totally amazed!"
"Ha! Not at all amazing, if you ask me," said Man Yung, smugly.
"And why not?" I asked.
"Don't you realize that you can get all of this - and more - in just one person? And you can experience the scintillating performance at your favourite local milonga every weekend!"
By golly, Man Yung is right again!
You CAN get all the yelling, screeching, guffawing, grunting, cackling, bellowing, hooting, yipping, yodeling, screaming, clacking, howling, shrieking, squealing - you name it, you got it - ALL NIGHT LONG, from just ONE PERSON. And you'll hear it, from the moment she enters into the milonga to the moment she leaves it, no matter whether she is sitting, standing, gabbing, eating, drinking, dancing, or even going to the washroom!
No need to shell out hard earned dough for airfare to travel to any Jungle Jamboree, Safari Shindig or even Death Metal Mayhem! We can have our own Carnival of the Animals while relaxing to our favourite Di Sarli, Caló, Fresedo etc. etc. tunes and we didn't even have to pay extra entrada - what a BONUS!
As they say: Win-Win!* + **
* Toronto Tangueros/Tangueras sure appreciate their entertainment - none of Ms. Jungle Jamboree's friends (including some Organizers!) make any noise even close to the variety or volume exhibited by their "Friend" (maybe they are AFRAID that being noisy and laughing and screaming loudly would be "DISTURBING THE MILONGA ATMOSPHERE" - what a thought!). In fact, they will sit back and enjoy this cackling and cawing all night long. This just shows - we polite Torontonians know when to let the "Professionals" do their thing. Good job guys!
** Buenos Aires Milongueros are such kill-joys by comparison. When we went to the same milonga as Ms. Jungle Jamboree in Buenos Aires, no less than FOUR sets of milongueros/milonguero couples asked us if we knew her (because everyone got word She was from Toronto).
We said no.
The milongueros were all visibly relieved.
2 comments:
I am new to the tango scene and I have seen (or should I say "heard") someone who like that at the milonga. At first, the "shrieking" incident reminded me of Marianne ran into Willoughby after he went MIA in Sense & Sensibility, only this woman was louder than Marianne. Then I ran into her again at another milonga and it was her laugh that made me realize it's her again. I thought this is how people behave at the milonga (remember, I am new). Guess I was wrong ...
Dear Tiny,
Thank you for confirming that we were not either hallucinating or making this up! Toronto Tango has indeed been invaded by a Barnyard Bacchanal, and isn't it amazing that all that noise came from just ONE PERSON?
We're also glad that we are spreading the word that all this yelling, shrieking, yapping, chortling, guffawing, laughing-out-loud etc. IS NOT NORMAL OR ACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOR IN A MILONGA. Would this screaming person make such a hoopla if she was attending a White House Soiree, a Nobel Peace Prize gala (or, for that matter, a Chinese Communist Party head honcho banquet), or even a private party by the CEO of a Fortune 500 company? The answer is no* (* unless she has severe psychological issues and has no fear of either the evil eye, or being carted away by security guards). Why? Because she would respect the host and the other attendees and be on her best behavior.
Why can't she then show the same respect for you and me when we are at the same milonga? We all paid the entrada to listen to great music and to enjoy dancing tango. We did not show up to listen to her shrill disruptive screaming ALL NIGHT. How can anyone enjoy the music when all they hear are shrieks? She may think that she is being "The Life of the Party" but in fact she is showing a selfish and profound lack of respect for all the other people at the milonga.
We are surprised that her "tango friends" (some of which are milonga organizers) would sit back and allow this disruptive screeching happen all night. They do not actually contribute to the noise (we observed some SILENT giggling when they were joking around with "The Loud One") so they obviously know that you aren't supposed to make such a hoopla and disrupt the milonga atmosphere. But did they tell their "friend" to stop and point out that all this noise is wrong? Not that we could see, because they all seemed to be enjoying all the noisy jokes and crudeness of this individual.
"Oh, but I can't possibly be rude and tell her off!" they might protest. IF YOU ARE REALLY HER FRIEND AND HAVE ANY CONCERN FOR HER OWN SELF-RESPECT, YOU HAVE TO DO IT. IF YOU ARE THE TANGO VETERAN THAT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU HAVE TO DO IT. THIS IS NOT ABOUT BEING RUDE TO YOUR "FRIEND", THIS IS ABOUT BEING RESPONSIBLE TO TANGO. You have to show, either by your words or your actions (like, don't sit back and laugh with her like it was ok!) that her behavior is WRONG.
If we don't speak out, or other milonga patrons don't speak out - heck, if her "friends" keep on pretending that it was "ok" for someone to be so disruptive in the milonga - pretty soon everybody including all the newcomers and the people who have been dancing tango for a while would think it was OK to show no respect for others in the Milonga.
No more respect would mean that it'll be ok - for people to kick other people in the shins and slash their stiletto heels willy-nilly in the air doing boleos on crowded dance floors. It'll be ok to disregard the line of dance. It'll be ok to do your big space-hogging moves and flap around like a giddy ostrich even if you are shoving everyone out of the way. And yes, it'll be ok to talk and laugh and scream so loudly no-one can hear the music.
If that day comes, we doubt that anyone but the fools would continue to dance tango.
Thanks for your comment!
Irene and Man Yung
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