The TALLEST of the Seven Dwarves

Group photo of the MOST "illustrious" Toronto Tango Instructors!

I've been pondering this question posed by Johanna as a response to my previous post:

Johanna said...

Irene, do you think common sense and Tango are mutually exclusive?

Which leads me to ponder: what comes first, the chicken or the egg? Does tango tend to attract and congregate the worst egoistic, nonsensical, self-deluding types, or is the tango community just a reflection of what humanity really is?

Of course, it is true that there are good, honest, honorable, kind, wise people in tango (otherwise, participation in tango would be completely unbearable), but let me just spend a couple of seconds bitching about the bad ones.

Toronto tango has been having an incredible influx of "new tango teachers" lately, as if we didn't already have one to one tango teacher/tango student parity. Of these newly minted instructors, there are good dancers, mediocre dancers and abysmal dancers - unfortunately more of the later than the former. In fact, many MORE of the later two than the first.

What makes all these mediocre/abysmal (or even so-called "good") dancers think that they are qualified to teach? How do they justify to themselves that they really have sufficient talent in dancing and teaching to produce students that will not add to the already quite large cesspool of mediocrity (or worse) that is World and Toronto Tango?

Over the years, many people have suggested to Man Yung and I that we should start teaching, (or have invited us to perform at the Toronto Tangofest, or the CNE etc.) but we have refused. Thanks but no thanks - we have a pretty lucid understanding of our abilities, and what it is that we want (and should be getting) out of tango. We are not DELUSIONAL.

However, many people are DELUSIONAL. If you are clearly a mediocre/abysmal dancer (I mean that you are clearly lacking in some basic skills of tango, i.e. you cannot do more than one rotation in a giro, you can't really execute moves that are not semi-choreographed, you can't tell the difference between dancing to the beat and dancing to the music, you can't navigate on the dance floor, you can't dance milonga or vals properly as you dance them as tango but faster and - let's face it - you walk like any of the scarecrow, tinman or the cowardly lion in the Wizard of Oz) why are you teaching? What is going on in that little head of yours?

Let me do a little mind reading and come up with some of YOUR justifications, ok?

1. EVERYONE knows that Toronto is a backwater town when it comes to tango. Since I am Argentinian/Latin/American/European/Spanish-speaking/French-speaking/German-speaking etc. etc. and I come from a way more traditional/sophisticated/trendy/innovative culture and I've spent a great deal of time in Buenos Aires "The CAPITAL OF TANGO" you toque-wearing hockey-playing ignoramus Torontonians should learn from me!

2. I have "worked with" (oops, what I mean is "taken the classes of" - no harm in a little resume padding) the GREATS of Tango and I have a resume with a list of workshops I have taken (but that I remember nothing from) so long that to print it out will literally cause a destruction of a small forest.

3. You see, I have a really great "angle" to promote myself by - see TA-CHANGO, PING-PANGO, BALL-RANGO, CRAPARANGO, etc.

4. Maybe I can teach only beginners because since they have no tango knowledge they won't know how crappy I really am.

5. Maybe I should only teach beginners in, say Sudbury so there's less chance that my students will come out to Toronto and will be able to see how crappy I am compared to other dancers.

6. I have membership in a great little tango "clique" in which we not only dance with each other, we also flatter each other to the skies - not only is there "strength in numbers", having a lot of like-minded sheep friends (oops, I mean "tangueros and tangueras") telling me that "Mr./Ms. X, you are SUCH a great dancer!" is surely proof that I am really great!

7. I AM THE TALLEST OF THE SEVEN DWARVES, i.e. Sure, I know there are many better dancers/instructors than me, but since there are evidently so many so-called instructors that are worse dancers than me (the little short middle-aged guy with the greasy pony-tail and the pot-belly that keeps on tripping up and dropping his partners onto the floor, for example), I must be a great dancer by comparison and I should definitely get my butt out there and spread my tango DNA!

It's one thing to have the praise-worthy aspiration of "promoting Argentine Tango to the world", but if you are going to act on your well-intentioned impulses, please make sure that you are not deluding yourself and that you have the skills to a) actually dance AND teach tango and that b) you are not just doing this for your ego because you are pathetic in the other areas of your life.