Saturday, June 4, 2016

We know it is getting hot.....

....But is it SO hot that it is absolutely necessary for guys to show up in the milonga dressed like basketball players?

"But Irene and Man Yung, it is hot! Shorts and jerseys keep me cool as a cucumber.  And when I'm trying to navigate in a crowded milonga, it kind of feels like I'm trying to dribble past the opposing players in a Raptors Game."

We've also seem some guys dig deep into their closets so they can go Tango in their scouts uniforms.  And just because it was hot, and not because it was Halloween!

"I swear....this kind of get-up at the milonga is just goddamn inappropriate."

We can assure you that a real milonguero won't be caught dead wearing shorts to a milonga.  From the anecdotes we have heard from our milonguero friends in Buenos Aires, little boys in Argentina  wear "short pants" and aren't allowed to wear "long pants" until they are old enough and man enough. 

Kids in shorts are only allowed to dance with their MAMA. 

So you have all these milongueros who have spent all their early years trying to get themselves a pair of long pants just so they can go tango with the big boys and girls.  The right to wear long pants is an important manly accomplishment.  No way are they going to ever wear shorts to dance tango, not in 45 degree heat, not when the air conditioning is broken and the fan is not working, not when the humidity is so bad it is like moving through soup, no way in hellfire and flames with the devil waving a pitchfork.

"Oh Man Yung, stop complaining!" I said.  "I know your pet peeve (apart from reckless bumper car dancers) is seeing guys in shorts in milongas.  I know it is not the best look, but they don't CARE about being milongueros.  Anyone wearing shorts couldn't give a damn about tango tradition or dancing with the best tangueras/milongueras.  Tango to these guys... is just salsa.  Or like going to the gym!  Give them half a year and they will be merrily on their way to bachata or merengue or afro-fusion or whatever it is that next catches their fancy."

Irene is only so tolerant....because like many other tangueras, she is secretly looking forward to the day when all the good looking buff tangueros will show up in the milonga wearing SPEEDOS.  Ah.  David Duchovny.  Shhhhhh!

***  Dear Tango Organizer: Please tell guys wearing shorts to milonga to STOP wearing shorts to milonga.  It is yucky.  However, if David Duchovny shows up wearing red speedos, he is more than welcome.  Thanks.


jessiechung said...

Dear Irene and Man Yung,

I enjoy very much reading this post about tangueros in shorts. I try to imagine my favourite tangueros in shorts at a milonga.....the vision in my head instantly turns me off. David Duchovny in a red speedo at a milonga? Irene...give me a break, please.



Irene and Man Yung said...

Dear Jessie,

LOL! It's a slippery slope. Today, the milonga organizers are letting guys in shorts at their milongas, tomorrow, the shorts will become daisy dukes and before you know it we'll have tangueros wearing thongs and flip flops and it will be beach season in Rio to your favourite tango tandas.


Man Yung wishes to add, red speedos not racy at all. He said once, he saw a guy wearing nude coloured swim briefs on the beaches of Hong Kong. Looking into the abyss of visible/not visible swimwear, Man Yung thought he was going blind!

Kind of like how many people feel when flashed during when nude knickers are exposed during particularly enthusiastic and fiery tango performances:

All the best to you and Dorian!

Irene and Man Yung

Tango Salon Adelaide said...

Great post!

Mercifully, I can't recall shorts at a milonga ... yet.

Taking another perspective: I'm not a huge fan of men exposing torsos and arms (hirsute or otherwise). Whether it's a fashion statement or a response to hot weather, sleeveless shirts on men at a milonga are a turn-off.


Cinderella said...

You don't know me, but I love you guys :) Sometimes reading your blog makes my day! Thanks for the David Duchovny imagery - lol!

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